so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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