okay pat passed out under dana's car
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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