Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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