Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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