it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
