i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
