Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Randomize
