I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
