I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
