I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
