she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
