Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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