There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
