If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
tell me about the eggs
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
