oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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