We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
