She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
How does one acquire holy water?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize