Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
