i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
