More tranny stories later!
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
