Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
