this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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