How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
