his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize