Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
