With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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