Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
