I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
