if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
