Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
