this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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