Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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