I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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