Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
