Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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