She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
