This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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