I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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