you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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