Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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