i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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