Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
hell yes lets make some ravioli
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
