We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
