Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
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