he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Drake has all the answers
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Randomize
