Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
