I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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