I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
