yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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