im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
